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Marriage Matters| A Clutch of Trophies

21:58Millicent Arebun


Hi, darlings. The current turbulent marriage saga of one of Nigeria’s fave couples Tiwa Savage and Tee Billz Balogun has been on the news 24/7 with everyone and his mother giving their myopic opinions and advice on how to they should either savage or dissolve the marriage. Watching and reading the unfolding sad drama, l began to ponder on the willful and often deadly ignorance, most of us exhibit and display when choosing a life partner.

Why do we consider marriage a social fad or ‘A Clutch of Trophies” when it’s an institution where the exchange of the reins of life, is made and upheld. You are basically entrusting your life, the lives, and well-being of your unborn children and your entire world into the hands of another human being, who you didn’t create nor shared the same womb  or upbringing with.

How selfish of us to based our choice of life partners on fleeting carnal emotions and willful ignorance, just to satisfy our own vanity. Then when the deadly consequences of our choices rear its ugly head we wail and scream.

Unfortunately, the lives of the innocents always pay the price. This poetry is written by my husband and aptly describes the importance and perils of choosing the right marriage partner

A clutch of trophies
So many things have come to worry me of late
Is it really all about fate?
In this game of love, are we really forced to participate?
What if it is not served on a golden plate?
What if it is loaded with weights and left to oscillate?

Most times little time arises for you to jubilate
Knowing that one mistake will grind your heart into paste
Is there actually hope for the patient one that will wait
To make a choice his conscience won’t castigate?
For everyone knows that if you lock your heart behind a gate
You might rot behind it with no one coming to your aid in haste
And won’t that be a bitter pill to taste?

But how can we this strange emotion regulate?
When its powers are impossible to dissipate
Since not for once do we anticipate
Our hearts to be locked with one with whom we cannot relate
Our existence dampened by emotions that would otherwise elevate
Nevertheless, should we leave all and migrate
To lands which some have seemed to relocate
Relinquishing the power to live, recreate and procreate?

We all know that love is absolutely not a mandate
And as such one can patiently choose to ignore its bait
So, what is the point that I wish to communicate?
Do not in a rush each feeling consummate
But find for yourself only a worthy mate

Written by Chidozie Onuoha

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